If you are bored with the fifty year wait to become a master in a martial art, never fear, make up your own! The more bizarre the better as Martial Edge tells us about the martial arts used in fiction that don’t actually exist... 10. Baritsu – the fictional martial art that Sherlock Holmes used in the story, “The Adventure of the Empty House” in 1901. Sir Arthur Conan Doyle probably got his martial art mixed up with jujitsu or bujutsu; but Holmes still managed to escape the enemy with this fictional martial wrestling from Japan.
9. Arcturan Kung-Fu – used by the purple, one-eyed babe Leela in Futurama. It looks similar to the high kicks to the face used in Taekwondo or Kungfu, only in purple.
8. Lightsaber Combat – the form of martial art used by the Jedi Knights in Star Wars. This is possibly the most complex of the fictional martial arts as, if you look this up in Wikipedia, there are numerous forms and terminology to rival any of the Asian martial arts. Puts making a lightsaber out of toilet rolls and making swooshing noises with your mates when you were a kid into context.
7. moQ’bara – the martial art used by the Klingons in the Star Trek series. This is another complex martial art used by a warrior type race with ridges on their foreheads and a very, very short temper. Imortalised by the character Worf from Star Trek: The Next Generation and his nifty use of the bat’leth sword.
6. V’shan and Suss Mahn – another set of Star Trek martial arts, this time part of the pointy eared Vulcan race. V’shan mostly consists of the Vulcan neck pinch immortalised by Dr Spock from the original series and Suss Mahn, a Vulcan version of high kicking Taekwondo practised by T’pol in Enterprise.
5. Venusian Karate (or Aikido) – a martial art used by Doctor Who in his third generation Jon Pertwee in the early seventies; this is mostly made up of throws and pressure point strikes. So when are we going to see some Time-Lord martial arts action from our current Doctor David Tennent?
4. Rex Kwon Do – the martial art developed and shown off by the character Rex in Napoleon Dynamite. He comes from two years experience in the Ultimate Fighting championship and came up with the immortal line whilst pointing to his loud and baggy stars and stripes trousers, “no one’s gonna roundhouse me in these bad boys.”
3. Mishima Style Fighting Karate – used in the computer game series Tekken by the Mishima family. It is a hybrid of the most popular Karate styles and takes most of its moves from the full-contact version of Kyokushin. This uses evasive movements such as the crouch dash, Tsunumi kicks and Hell sweeps.
2. Plumb Fu – As used by the brothers Mario and Luigi in the TV series Super Mario Brothers. This martial art was unique to Italian plumbers and consisted of using a long-hafted plunger as a bo staff and a pair of pipes as nunchakus.
1. Ecky-Thump – Yes, even the The Goodies had their own martial art. Now who’s old enough to remember them? (eek, I am!) In the episode “Kung Fu Kapers” shown in 1975; Bill was discovered to be a master in the unknown Lancashire martial art of Ecky Thump. This mostly consisted of hitting people over the head with a black pudding but what made this episode infamous was that a main actually died of a heart attack because he laughed for a full 25 minutes whilst watching the show. Honestly, you really can’t make stuff like this up.
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