Sometimes when we try to approach a task it seems too big to manage,
unobtainable from where we are standing, beyond our limits. For me, in
relation to my martial art of Taekwondo, there are two areas where this
happens regularly.
Sometimes when we try to approach a task it seems too big to manage,
unobtainable from where we are standing, beyond our limits. For me, in
relation to my martial art of Taekwondo, there are two areas where this
happens regularly. One is at gradings and the other at competitions.
For many of you these present no problem at all. The martial arts are
renowned for building confidence, but we also know how many people drop
out of training along the way and though reasons of time or cost are
often cited, I wonder how many simply find the thought of a grading or
a competition too overwhelming?
One of the problems psychologists repeatedly experience when working
with people to change their behaviours is that whilst they can
effectively change a person’s attitudes, it is incredibly difficult to
then get them to take the action required to alter their behaviour.
This is a problem I’ve encountered myself and still do. I am a few
weeks away from my black belt grading and the enormity of the task is
weighing on my mind and has been for some time. Over my last few years
of training and competing however, I have found a way of dealing with
this issue that I term ‘sneaking under the wire’. By this I mean
getting to the point where I find myself in the midst of the situation
whilst tricking my mind that nothing too important is really happening,
not letting my mind think too much. Too much thinking brings me to a
panicked standstill and a desire to shift into reverse gear. “No, I
really do think I need six more months training before I grade.”
The Blackbelt
I remember many moons ago when I asked my Father about the martial arts (which he knew nothing about but I figured he would because he was a career Army officer...) and the fabled "black belt." He told me that in order for one to acquire the black belt one had to actually kill another man with one's bare hands. He really believed this tale although I never learned where he'd originally heard it.
So, how do I manage this? I start with two things. First I simply show
up and train, regularly. This is just for me and I refuse to connect it
to gradings or competitions even though I know that without it I cannot
do either. Training is just that, practise; single evening of working
at my techniques and fitness. Secondly, I take these big, scary tasks
and break them down into little pieces. As a friend of mine says, “how
do you eat an elephant? One piece at a time.” So currently I’m not
thinking about my black belt grading, I’m thinking about my mock
grading in a couple of weeks. Mock gradings I’ve done before. I’ll be
in familiar surroundings with fellow students and only my instructor
will be testing me. Not too difficult, I can manage that. I don’t think
further than that until I know I’ve passed. Then I will focus on the
first black belt training session. This is new! I’ll be in a new
environment with people I don’t know, a different format; the
unfamiliar. But I tell myself that I’m going with fellow students who
are friends and we will support each other. After that there are two
more sessions, each a little less intimidating although I don’t imagine
any less work! And then? And then I find the grading upon me. It just
snuck up on me whilst I wasn’t looking, I wasn’t paying attention to it
because I was busy with the other, small stuff. Now though, I can focus
my attention on it, because I’ve managed the other tasks I had to
complete first and completing those successfully makes the last part a
little less daunting.
A German psychologist called Heckhausen developed a model for the
process of behaviour change called the Rubicon Model. One of the
problems psychologists repeatedly experience when working with people
to change their behaviours is that whilst they can effectively change a
person’s attitudes, it is incredibly difficult to then get them to take
the action required to alter their behaviour. Heckhausen calls the
point where the attitude is transformed into action the ‘irrevocable
step’ or the point of no return. I think for some people who want to
train in martial arts but are not blessed with an abundance of
confidence, sneaking the tasks under the wire may help them to continue
and develop their training, to find themselves taking that irrevocable
step, hopefully to the point where confidence takes over and they no
longer need to do this; or they simply apply this tool to add new and
bigger challenges into their lives. For any of you with challenges
coming up I hope this gives you one way of approaching them.
Techniques and Tutorials 
Sometimes when we try to approach a task it seems too big to manage,
unobtainable from where we are standing, beyond our limits. For me, in
relation to my martial art of Taekwondo, there are two areas where this
happens regularly.
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