A funny thing happened today. I was in a key cutting shop getting some copies made for my new flat when the customer before me was handed his keys and he did a runner! For the sake of 4 quid!

Of course, in my head I chased the guy down, rugby tackled him and said, 'In the name of Taekwondo, I command you to stop!' But in reality, myself, the key cutting bloke and old chap sitting in the corner just looked at each other in a bewildered fashion.

Hmmm....